This is a testimonial piece by Chicago Theatre Community member Robin Minkens, who had a multi-year experience with Trap Door Theatre, a local storefront theatre. This is a personal experience, told from a single perspective. These pieces by their nature, and per our mission, are subjective by intention. *Rescripted has not independently verified the details in this testimonial. The opinions in this piece belong solely to the author.* This is not reporting, but community support. Our aim as always is to amplify those who do not have a platform, and to empower the experience of the artist.
Editor’s Note: Robin came to me through Facebook at the end of April because she had seen my own testimonials on social media. Robin had recorded her experience in a draft, and was wondering if her experience had merit, and if it would be beneficial to share it with others. At that time, she did not know that I was an editor, or of the existence of Rescripted. When I had read the entirety of her story, I was appalled. What captured me about Robin’s testimonial is that it is a story many of us have lived through. Emerging into a professional theatre scene with abundant hopes and dreams, only to encounter prejudice, maltreatment, and gaslighting. The commonalities in this piece are harrowing to me, because they require us to accept that the way we have been working is not ethical. The experiences we have endured are not acceptable. This piece is a death by a thousand paper cuts. I encourage you to read it to the end. This is Part Two, and you can access Part One by clicking this link.
ALAS
I was cast in a virtual show at Trap Door in the summer of 2020, titled Alas. It was directed by Company Manager of Trap Door, Michael Mejia. That show went fine to my knowledge. I was excited because I had free range to choose my own costume, hair, and make up. The actors were given the dimensions, and angles, to work with to position our cameras. The look I sent in received final approval from Michael Mejia.
This is a photo of the makeup design I chose:
I received direct positive feedback from Nicole and Michael on the look that was seen by the entire company and whomever tuned in to view the project.
We shot everything ourselves. The images and videos were taken in my home with my cell phone and tripod stand I purchased that summer, and sent to the director for them to edit and compile as they wished. Very fun to work on because we were in the thick of a pandemic, not knowing what the future would hold. I explain this because Michael Mejia would later go on to give unsolicited advice in 2022, stating that “You do not know who you are artistically.” I replied “Really?” They responded, “Not that I have seen at Trap Door, let me know if you have any questions.” By this time, I had worked with Michael on The White Plague, they had cast me in Alas, and during the time of their advice, we were working on The Little Mermaid Immersive Cocktail Experience.
The Artistic Director, Beata Pilch, left for Poland around this time in 2020.
The Quarantine Files
Working on The Quarantine Files was the first plot of an unexpected trend. I noticed Matty rubbing elbows with employers I mentioned to him when we were speaking. The Quarantine Files was a virtual project I worked on with a separate production company in August of 2020. This project was similar to Alas, where the actors would film scenes and send in the footage to be edited by the company’s director. While Matty Robinson and I were dating, I mentioned to him that this company filmed my first short out of college in 2018. This same production company invited me out to do a podcast, and I shared how much much fun I had working with them on that occasion as well. Matty stated this same company invited him to work on something around that time, and he turned them down. I asked him why, and he stated that “I just did not want to work with them”, and further expressed disinterest through our dialogue. I responded by telling him how they are a great company, and how I thoroughly enjoyed them. He maintained his stance of not wanting to work with this company.
Microaggressions: Energy Does not Lie
Once those virtual projects were over, I was contacted to audition for an immersive show during the pandemic called, The Mad Hatters Gin and Tea Party, with a company called FeverUp. That was to begin its run in September of 2020. The resident costume designer at Trap Door recommended me, amongst others at the company, to audition. I was so happy to be cast in this show, because I did not know what the future of theatre would hold for me. Miguel Long was also cast in this same show, in the same trio cast as me.
Working on this show was fun, with the exception of microaggressions and judgements I would receive from Miguel, the only person I knew there. I was cool with everyone else, but whenever Miguel and I would go to interact, it would feel forced, like he was watching me and judging everything I did. He treated me as though I were beneath him. The energy I would receive from him would go on to sometimes make my interactions with others strange, because whenever I would go to talk to others he was always there listening or interjecting in a conversation he wasn’t a part of.
During this show, he would later pull me to the side and question what is on my resume. I had never auditioned for him or submitted my resume to him and have no idea what prompted him to ask. Between shows in a whispered tone he randomly asked me “Do you really know archery?”
This is a skill listed on my resume because I have been trained on the safety of handling a bow and arrow for an equity show and had to work with it on stage in 2017. It also occurred to me that he may have asked me this question because I told Matty that I was interested in archery. He and I went on a date to an archery range. What made Miguel randomly ask this question? This was the first time I was cast in the same show as Miguel. I am not sure if it was because I could not relate to him, but to my knowledge I have never disrespected him, nor done anything to have received the unwarranted energy and glares from him.
I developed a nice working relationship with FeverUp though, and they cast me again for one of their next immersive shows the next summer, The Little Mermaid Immersive Cocktail Experience. In a phone call in 2020, I mentioned to Nicole that I was happy that Trap Door provided this opportunity, and she quickly cut me off mid sentence to correct me and say that Trap Door did not provide this opportunity. I corrected myself, and clarified that the costume director gave me the opportunity to audition. She scoffed, and became silent.
Too close for coincidences: In Person Round Table Read at the Top of 2020
I was invited out to participate in a table reading at Nicole’s house in her dining room. I bought baked goods from the Jewel-Osco down the street from her place. I had never been to her house before. Everyone who worked on The White Plague was there, with the exception of Michael Mejia. The energy I felt was strange from a few members at the table, mostly Miguel and David. At this point, I had never had a one-on-one direct interaction with David in my life, not even onstage during the White Plague. At the reading, whenever I would go to speak, or make a joke, David and Miguel would make eye contact in unison. They would not acknowledge my presence or what I had said, but look back down at the table. Everyone else remained neutral in body language and would interact with me. After the reading was completed, it was collectively asked if there would be others we could recommend to participate in readings.
At this reading in Nicole’s apartment, I realized that this is the same apartment building I had helped Matty Robinson move into. Matty and I were not talking at this time. However, I mentioned Matty Robinson as someone who could attend table reads. Matty had been living in this same building since August of 2019 to my knowledge. I also shared to everyone else at that time that Matty lived in the basement of the building, so it would be convenient for travel times. At this time, I did not know that Matty was at odds with me. After mentioning Matty, a few at the table again looked at one another, and then looked at Nicole, not acknowledging what I stated. This added to the sense that I was being discussed when I wasn’t around, or there was information I was not in on.
Another Invitation: May 2020
I spoke to Nicole in May of 2020, when she invited me out to a birthday party for her boyfriend at the time (who would later become her fiancé). I messaged her via text to follow up, and to ask if there was anything that I could bring to the party, and she never responded. Since I did not receive a response to my RSVP, I decided to not attend the party. I later learned that Matty was at the party by word from Venice. I did not inquire, Venice volunteered this information. I did not hear from Nicole again until she reached out to ask me about casting on October 5th, 2020.
A couple of weeks after that exchange, I asked Nicole if she met Matty. Matty Robinson is someone I have experienced trauma with, and I did not want to go far into those details with Nicole. But I did find it necessary to share what I did, because I introduced the thought of him, and they did eventually connect. This next text conversation occurred because when Matty came up in conversation, she asked me what I thought of him. This conversation took place in October 2020, some months after the party.
Upon initially connecting with Matty, he would try to introduce me to people that he knew in the industry, and he attended one of my shows. Also, I introduced the thought of him at the table read, so I followed up with them both. As stated in the text, I texted Matty after the reading, statingworking with Trap Door to see if he was interested, and he never responded. Matty had given me lifts to rehearsal at Trap Door, and picked me up from some shows, so he was not unfamiliar with who I was working with. A reader of this may be asking, why did I bring his name up to the peers of a theater company, when I was already experiencing toxic interactions with him? The main reason was because he introduced me to some of his industry friends while we were in passing, but importantly, we shared successful moments of our career as well as unfortunate moments. He is a fellow person of color who may have wanted to work during the pandemic.
Nicole’s response on October 16th:
Nicole’s comment, “you don’t even have to rehearse with him… I can keep you separate,” stood out to me. At this time, I had no idea if Nicole cast him in anything, or what they had worked out. There were no auditions being held because we were in a pandemic. After reading these messages, I noticed she used the word “priority,” which I assumed she was using because I was a current company member, and Matty was her neighbor, and not a company member. Up to this point, she was contacting me often, and sharing a lot of information with me. Per the emails I received from the Artistic Director that I included in this post, Beata stated, “…and being that you worked with us previously, and are currently, we would like to officially invite you into the company.” I knew that Matty never auditioned for or worked with Trap Door before, so I allowed Nicole’s comments to roll off.
At this time, October 2020, I had not yet revealed to Nicole the specific parameters of the sexual trauma I had experienced from Matty, how that impacted me, and my interactions with others going forward. It would have helped to have clear expectations and intentions from Nicole, and with facilitation Matty as well. I realized after this line of communication that I should have immediately said exactly what had taken place. Like The Quarantine Files, I realized this was the second instance where Matty was slowly and underhandedly forming relationships with previous and current employers of mine.
Via a phone call we had later in March of 2021, Nicole told me that, at the birthday party that I did not receive an RSVP response for, Matty told her that we were “in a relationship” and that it “did not end well.” She did not share any more details on their discussion. I understand that the word “relationship” can be ambiguous, however, the way she expressed this information alluded to us being in a serious committed relationship. Considering that he stated he had “a relationship” with me and “It did not end well” to the Managing Director of Trap Door, where he knows I am currently working, I became curious whether this would impact my employment status with the company. Considering the way Nicole had handled sensitive information previously, I did not feel confident that my personal information would be left out of the friendship that she and Matty later nurtured.
I do not understand why that was a first impression topic of conversation, unless Matty and Nicole had already developed a rapport. One would have to be comfortable enough to share this type of information upon meeting someone, and to feel that they had some sort of leverage, support, or confidence that they would be protected in some way. What was the gain of sharing this false information about me? At this point, considering Nicole’s early behavior of gossip, I was curious on what other personal information was shared, or what was inquired from Nicole. Considering I had seen first-hand how Nicole moves, the idea of loyalty began to appear far-fetched. Remember what I stated earlier in this post about drama, and gossip. I appeared to be a topic, and source of entertainment for this crowd. This was being spearheaded by my employer, Nicole Weisner. I am writing this post to deliberately outline the exploitation of a new theater artist by leadership, and how she looped in staff, who helped the bullying and ego-driven actions that could not go unnoticed.
Lingering Trauma: 2021
After I worked on Trap Door’s first virtual show Alas, directed by Michael Mejia in 2020, Trap Door was planning for The White Plague to remount for an outdoor performance in the summer of 2021, for Night out in the Parks. Nicole mentioned to me that she was thinking of casting Matty, just in case all of the original actors could not participate. I thought to myself, ‘Out of all the people, it has to be Matty- who is not a company member, to be thrown in?’ At this time, I am thinking that it is time to reveal all of the details of what has taken place between Matty and I, to avoid uncomfortable situations. But all of a sudden, it became difficult to get in contact with Nicole.
The time came for a viewing party of The White Plague. I found that my Zoom link did not work on my phone. David Lovejoy sent out the links, but mine was not working. I did reach out to both ze and Nicole before the watch party had begun, and received no response. By the grace of God, I had an old iPhone that I charged up, and the Zoom link worked on that device. At this time, it was nearly impossible to get ahold of Nicole or David – all necessary communication was being kept short. I would find myself texting or emailing Nicole, trying to make sure we were on the same page. She was not responding to my text messages, emails, or returning my phone calls – this was the complete opposite of my first impression of communications with her. At one point, she would text or call me when she felt like it, expecting to receive a response. The White Plague was set to perform September 16–18th, and on August 1st of 2021 I received an email that the show was canceled, without any reason as to why.
It is time for Trap Doors’ next virtual series called Decomposed Theatre, and Beata is still in Poland. At this time Miguel Long and I were on a hiatus from the immersive show we were working on, The Mad Hatters Gins and Tea Party, due to Covid-19. The show was to pick up again in the upcoming few months in 2021. It has been months since I last directly communicated with Nicole, my initial contact with Trap Door. There have not been any auditions held, so I could not meet new directors. There were no auditions held for Decomposed, but Nicole had personally contacted me to work with her on episode 5 of the series.
After agreeing, my first days of rehearsal were only myself, Natara, and Nicole, so when an email was sent out, I could only see our three names. I later learned, via the first mass email that went out to the entire cast, that Matty was cast in the same episode. At this time, Matty is not a company member and has not had an official audition. All I know at this point is that he lives in the same apartment building as Nicole.
This is a four part testimonial authored by Robin Minks about her experience with Trap Door Theatre. This is Part Two.
Click here to read Part Three.
*We had thought this was evident from our initial editor’s note, but community feedback made it clear further clarification was needed. After some consultation, we have added this clause. Thank you for calling us in.
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Photo Credit: Chris Popio. Top L-R Michael Mejia, Robin Minks. Bottom L-R Emily Nichelsen and Venice Averyheart.